A Blessing, Not a Curse

Our society tells us that children are a burden. We are told that it’s “normal” to need copious amounts of coffee and multiple glasses of wine just to make it through the day in a household with kids. It’s acceptable to throw snacks and screens in their faces all day in order to keep them occupied so that us parents can focus on more “crucial” things. Oftentimes in our culture, becoming pregnant is viewed as an inconvenience, in which case, a woman may unfortunately choose to no longer carry her child in her womb. In our society, when you become a parent, you have to “give up your dreams.” Moms aren’t able to relish in the joys of motherhood, because they’re preoccupied with worry, to-do lists, and perfectly curated Instagram boxes. In the Old Testament, God would bless faithful Israelite families- specifically with the blessing of children. He detested the deeds of the pagan lands because they would sacrifice their children to their own gods. Our culture is not far off from the cultures of the pagan lands in the Old Testament. We also “sacrifice” our children to our own false “gods.”  In a world of “you do you”, “self- care”, and climbing to the top in the workplace, we are brainwashed into thinking that our kids are in the way of our most important work. Children are to be “seen and not heard.” The Bible tells us, though, that children are THE most important work. King Solomon says in Psalm 127:3-5, “Children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb is a reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior, so are the children of one’s youth. Happy is the man who has his quiver full of them.” The Hebrew form of the word ‘heritage’ in that passage is “nahalat,’ which means “something inherited, an heirloom, an estate or portion.” Solomon clearly communicates here that our children are not ours! They are little eternal souls that are entrusted to us to care for, nurture, and guide, just for a moment in eternity. No pressure, right?

So if parenting is a gift and a reward, why is it so hard?! Kids- they make us go through diapers like money grows on trees, they are destructive to the insides of our minivans, they rack up the grocery bill,  keep us up through all hours of the night, give us gray hair, and inevitably get called into the Headmaster’s office at school. Nonetheless, they are our children and  they are a blessing. Some of these blessings are very obvious from the beginning. The way a fresh newborn smells, their first smile, the first time they say “Dada,” their first steps, the wonder in their eyes as they’re discovering the world around them. Other blessings require a deeper look. What does this mean when looking at our regular daily lives with our children, which can at times be draining and mundane? 

1.     Training our children in obedience strengthens our own obedience to God. When we recognize and correct sin in our children’s day to day lives, we are made aware of where we might have modeled that sin to them and we are given the opportunity to repent and turn from it.  It’s almost like God designed it that way! 

2.     The demands of meeting the needs of our children reduces selfishness in our hearts. We get to sacrifice our time, energy, money, and comfort to nurture and care for our kids. Yes, even when you’re up at 3am with a colicky baby, when you have to cancel date night because your child gets the stomach bug,  when they break their arm on vacation, when you have to leave work early for a parent-teacher conference, or when a thunderstorm causes you to have a bed-full of terrified blanket-hoggers. We get the opportunity to check our hearts and display Christ-like selflessness to our kids. 

3.     Watching them grow causes us to wonder at the miracle of His creation. You never forget seeing the first ultrasound or hearing their heartbeat for the first time. The mere fact that a human can be fully formed in a mother’s womb in just forty weeks is enough to make you stop and marvel at His handiwork. Looking back on pictures of your kids when they were smaller is always so much fun. You’re able to remember how small and wide-eyed to the world they were and compare how they’ve grown and matured physically, as well as spiritually. They grow into their own personalities and form their own opinions. We delight in watching our children grow, just as the Father delights in watching us grow. 

4.     Our relationship with our children gives us a glimpse into how our Father sees us with his own eyes. Our children look like us. We are also made in God’s image. (Genesis 1:26). We are to raise our children to obey our authority. God is also our ultimate authority. (Ephesians 6:1-4). When we comfort and reassure our children, we remember He comforts us. When we become parents, we are quickly made aware of how compassionate, patient, and loving our Heavenly Father is with us, because we get to be compassionate, patient, and loving to our children. 

             Children are a heritage belonging to the Lord, not given by the Lord. Again, this means they are not ours! If we believe that they truly belong to the Lord, it makes us carefully question every decision and move we make. What do we let their little eyes see and their little ears hear? What foods do we fuel their little “temples” with? How do we react when we step on a Lego or a Barbie shoe while tucking them in bed? When do we let them have a cell phone or their own social media account? Who is teaching them in the classroom five days a week, eight hours a day? Who is shepherding them from the pulpit on Sundays and Wednesdays? Here at GCCA, you can rest assured that you will not be making these against-the-grain decisions by yourself. We are all navigating this together- teachers and parents alike.  We all want what’s best for our children, while respecting God’s authority and looking to Him for guidance. 

            There is a song by Bethany Dillon (now Bethany Barnard, married to Shane Barnard of Shane & Shane) that I loved to listen to as I rocked my girls to sleep when they were babies. Inevitably by the end of the song, I would have hot tears streaming down my face. The weight of parenthood is heavy! This was my prayer and the lyrics of the song:

                        “Every prayer for you is like a seed in the ground

                        Every tear I cry is like rain

                        And in its due season

                        I pray a harvest would be found

                        Your heart and mouth confessing Jesus’ name.

                        Your heart and mouth confessing Jesus’ name.”

            I didn’t quite realize until I was a parent myself that when you are a child, you are actually watching your parents grow up, too.  Isn’t that the truth! We don’t all have it figured out yet, and praise the Lord we don’t have to! No matter what season of life you’re in- teacher, parent, grandparent-be encouraged! It is a true joy and a blessing to have children in your life to guide, nurture, and grow, because your Father is guiding, nurturing, and growing you along the way as well- growing pains and all. 

By Carrie Taylor, GCCA Pre-K Teacher